Arrogant Worms - Particle Board Lyrics

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Well my baby came at me with a 2x4 
So I fought her off with sandpaper 
It was 60 grit, it was really rough 
And it made a lot of sawdust 

But we patched things up with love and glue 
We went to the church and said "I do" 
Our honeymoon was at a hardware store 
Our love's a lot like particle board 

Particle Board, it ain't got no grain 
Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain 
Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that 
Our love's a lot like particle board 

Well I heard the train come rolling by 
With cattle on board, so we decided 
We should drop everything and hop that train 
And take a one-way trip to the slaughterhouse 

Well we stared at the cattle as they took the walk 
To meet the man who worked the saw 
We stared at the blood and the guts and the gore 
It looked an awful lot like particle board 

Particle Board, it ain't got no grain 
Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain 
Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that 
Our love's a lot like particle board 

We made love on a flat bed truck 
She worried about getting splinters in her butt 
I said don't think about those problems when we rut 
The deck's made of particle board 

Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 

Particle board, you could make a dresser 
Or a shelf or a hutch or an ottoman 
You could leave it like it is or paint it up 
It's still gonna be made of particle board 
Particle board, it's useful stuff 
It's stronger than glue, it's better than fluff 
It sounds like a simile and that's enough 
To say that our love's a lot like particle board 

Our love's a lot like particle board 
Our love's a lot like particle board 
Our love's a lot like particle board 

Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 
Particle Board!

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lyrics submitted by Rebecca L. on 04-01-2005
lyrics corrected on 04-01-2005