Arrogant Worms - The Christmas Song Lyrics

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The table's set and 
The turkey's out 
Christmas is here 
Let out a shout 
The family's gathered all about 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Everyone is wearing big smiles 
They all try to 
Act nice for a while 
Then George calls his in-laws vile 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Always that one time of the year 
When everyone's problems disappear 
And everyone smiles from ear to ear 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

George has been drinking a lot 
He just can't keep 
Out of the sauce 
He says his wife's been 
Screwing her boss 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Margaret throws her food in his face 
People are hungry 
It's really a waste 
Then she screams, 
"How does that taste?" 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Always that one time of the year 
When everyone's problems disappear 
And everyone smiles from ear to ear 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

George picks up the carving knife 
Weilds it around 
And starts to slice 
Henry cocks his shotgun twice 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Henry says, 
"Hey, what's the deal? 
Just sit down and finish your meal 
Or I'll pump you full of steel!" 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Always that one time of the year 
When everyone's problems disappear 
And everyone smiles from ear to ear 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Police arrive just after eight 
Responding to a noise complaint 
Open the door 
What a grisly fate 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Fa la la and deck the halls 
Blood was spattered on the walls 
Merry Christmas, one and all! 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Always that one time of the year 
When everyone's problems disappear 
And everyone smiles from ear to ear 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

Always that one time of the year 
When everyone's problems disappear 
And everyone smiles from ear to ear 
Christmas, Christmas is here! 

(*spoken* Merry Christmas! Yeah.)

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