"Lavender Cowboy" Lyrics

He was only a lavender cowboy,
The hairs on his chest were two,
But he wished to follow the heroes
And fight like the he-men do.

But he was inwardly troubled
By a dream that gave him no rest,
That he'd go with his heroes in action
With only two hairs on his chest.

"Herbicedes" and other hair lotions
He rubbed on his chest every night
But when he awoke in the morning
Not a new hair had grown into sight

First he tried many a hair tonic.
'Twas rubbed in on him each night.
But still when he looked in the mirror
Those two hairs were ever in sight.

But with a spirit undaunted
He wandered out to fight,
Just like an old-time knight errant
To win combat for the right.

(He fought fro Red Nellie her honor)
He battled for Red Nellie's honor
And cleaned out a holdup's nest
He died with his six guns a-smoking
(But) With only two hairs on his chest.

They buried him out on the prairie
Where the wolves how all night
And over the place where his bones lie
Two cacti have grown into sight
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