It's not easy having yourself a good time Greasing up those bets and betters Watching out they don't four letter Fuck and kiss you both at the same time Smells like something I've forgotten Curled up, died and now it's rotten I'm not a gangster tonight Don't want to be a bad guy I'm just a loner baby And now you've gotten in my way I can't decide Whether you should live or die Oh, you'll probably go to heaven Please don't hang your head and cry No wonder why My heart feels dead inside It's cold and hard and petrified Lock the doors and close the blinds We're going for a ride It's a bitch convincing people to like you If I stop now, call me a quitter If lies were cats, you'd be a litter Pleasing everyone isn't like you Dancing jigs until I'm crippled Slug ten drinks I won't get pickled I've got to hand it to you You've played by all the same rules It takes the truth to fool me And now you've made me angry I can't decide Whether you should live or die Oh, you'll probably go to heaven Please don't hang your head and cry No wonder why My heart feels dead inside It's cold and hard and petrified Lock the doors and close the blinds We're going for a ride Oh I could throw you in the lake Or feed you poison birthday cake I won't deny I'm going to miss you when you're gone Oh I could bury you alive But you might crawl out with a knife And kill me when I'm sleeping That's why I can't decide Whether you should live or die Oh, you'll probably go to heaven Please don't hang your head and cry No wonder why My heart feels dead inside It's cold and hard and petrified Lock the doors and close the blinds We're going for a ride