Eminem - Can-I-Bitch Lyrics

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Intro: 
(little girl) 
I, I wanna grow up toon 
Poppa Marshall, will you tell us a bed time story? 

(Eminem) 
Heeere we gooo 
Now once upon a time not long ago 
There was a little rapper about to blow 
But his album came and it was not good 
I think it went letter double pop a wood 
So the silly little fans they were mislead 
By a nerdy internet computer hip-hop head 

"Me and you clef we're gonna make some cash 
Grab the silver paint and let's paint my ass" 

Hey mister, would ya get a bear witness tah 
The ass-whippin I'm about to administah 
To this ass-kissin little vagnal blista 
Stan-abis, little Marshall Mathers sista 
And in this corner, we have a mister 
Not havin it it's the machinista 
Dr. Evil with his bag of tricks for 
This little antagonist bag of dick-suckin 
Ex LL Cool Jay fan from Windsor 
I'm bout to murder little guinea fag Anista 
You bastard, I ain't wanna have to diss ya 
Canabis, where the fuck you at I miss ya 

Can-a-bitch oh can-a-bitch where for art thou can-a-bitch? 
Please tell me what happened with that style that you were rappin with? 
Can-a-bitch oh can-a-bitch are you from Los Angeles 
New York or just a janitor from Canada? Oh Can-a-bitch 

Now at first I ain't really understand this shit 
Picture me for a second and imagine it 
Chillin in a bat man chair an relaxin 
When all a sudden some bullshit comes across the scanner 
It's 'Can-a-bitch' or some Stan lives shit 
They creep me out at first man this is sick 
But me being just a sick as conflict gets my dick harder than arithmetic 
And I know how you jealous ones envy 
I shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent me 
The first two letters you were 
Tellin me shit like you respect me like any other regular MC 
The third letter you ask 
How come I ain't return none of the messages at Shady Records you left me? 
The fourth Letter Slim you really startin to upset me 
The fifth letter told me you were comin to get me 
The sixth letter there's a bomb threat in our building 
This crazy mother fucker's really tryin to kill me 
So I went back and read the first few letters 
That said some shit about a message you left 
Oh shit that's not an e that's an a 
This dude wants to leave me a massage he's gay 
Right away I'm on the phone with Dr. Dre 
We got a bogey Marshall I'm on the way 

Can-a-bitch oh can-a-bitch where for art thou can-a-bitch? 
Please tell me what happened with that style that you were rappin with? 
Can-a-bitch oh can-a-bitch are you from Los Angeles 
New York or just a janitor from Canada? Oh Can-a-bitch 

So in two seconds flat Dre's at my crib 
Only thing is we both know where this kid lives 
And neither one of us have Canadian citizenship 
Shit oh Dre wait a mintue that's it 
All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo boost 
We can fly over the border Let's go whoosh 
So we're off to Toronto and we're gainin speed 
Pfftt Arghh What was that? Oh Jermaine Dupre fuck It 
Keep goin no time to waste 
Wait backup hit him one more time in case (Okay) 
Fuck now he's draggin under the car 
Oh well only 30 more thousand miles 
Meanwhile me and Dre are tryin to conversate 
Just tryin to find a reason for the constant hatin 
And tryin to figure out what happened to Jermaine propaine 
He couldn't have fell of that hard ain't no way 

What happened to the way you was rappin, 
When you was scandalous then Canabis turned into a television evangelist? 

Plus he raps with his regular voice 
Pft, pft, pft, pft What was that? (Pet Shop Boys) 
So we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted 
His corpse was still movin but his ass was rotted 
He kind of smelled a little like Courtney Love 
I figured if I stick him with a fork he's done 
So I stapped him twice kept jabbin christ 
He won't die this guy's like a battered wife 
He's like Kim he keeps comin back for more 
But he won't fight back I cracked his jaw 
Hold up Bis quit foldin up 
Punch me in the chest make my shoulders touch 
Do somethin at least one punch line 
C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9-tey-nine percent of my fans are blonde 
Bis c'mon answer me man respond 
Tell me bout the sun, rain, moon and stars 
Intergalatic or metaphors from Mars 
Raw to the floor raw like Resovoir dogs 
Bite another line from Red Man's song 
Suddenly the stub of a dead man's arm from a midget 
Reaches out from under the car 
It's JD, this motherfucker won't die neither 
Dre starts sprayin him with cans of Ether Sshhhh 
We stomped the bitch and then stopmed the bitch again 
(Compton) Detroit Bitch talk some shit again 
Stomp him (switch feet) 
Stomp him (switch again) 
Dre alright he's dead dawg quit kickin him 
I think Stan-abis jumped off the bridge again (Arghhhhhh.....Damn!) 
He disappeared yo he's gone he did it again 

[Chorus]

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lyrics submitted by StormTheKid
lyrics corrected on 27-01-2009