Do you even know who I am?
Have you seen me around before?
I'm not Christina or Katy Perry
My sales are far too poor

I've tried being different and punky
My dresses are worn to shock
I've been in a couple of movies
It's not getting me any cock!

Du-bidi-du-be-du
I've had lots of Top Ten hits

Diddly-dum-de-du-dum
But nobody gives a shit!

So what's wrong?
I'm not a big star
Is it my face?
Where's my fan base?
What?
Well, screw you

And what do I do
To get on YouTube?
My songs sound all right
But it's not right!

And my pants are tight
And my heels are high
Just like Kylie's!
So what?
I'm not a big star
You know me vaguely
My publicist ain't got it right!

Du-bidi-du-be-du (?)
Diddly-dum-de-dum